Though it sounds true, and though I understand the sentiment behind this “bumper sticker-ism,” fear isn’t a liar.
Rather, fear is a valid emotion, an expression of something happening deep inside (often because of some external circumstance) that our heart seeks to communicate to us.
If you’re about to step off the edge of a cliff, fear is healthy. Fear might save you from walking down dark alley, keep you from engaging in a verbal barrage with a bully, or trying to cross a railroad track when there’s an oncoming train. You get the idea.
No, we don’t want to be controlled by fear, but we do want to hear what our hearts are saying.
In fact, the same is true of ALL of our emotions…
❌ We don’t want to avoid them.
❌ We don’t want to be controlled by them.
✅ We do want to hear what they’re saying to us…
That leads me to this...
We’re often afraid to talk about- or even feel- the “bad” emotions. We’ve been told that fear and anger and some of the other emotions aren’t healthy. Hence the “bumper sticker-isms,” memes, and pithy one-liners.
Let me offer a different perspective:
👉 There aren’t bad emotions and good emotions. Just healthy and unhealthy expressions of all of them.
Many of us are taught- from a young age- to be afraid of the “bad” emotions. But, we shouldn’t be.
Throughout the New Testament we read truths like-
💚 Jesus wept multiple times, including at Lazarus’ tomb (John 11:35) and even over the city of Jerusalem itself (see Luke 13:35, 19:41).
💚 Jesus became angry on several occasions. He overturned the money changers’ tables in the temple, after taking the time to make a whip to loosen the sacrificial animals (John 2:15, Matthew 21:12). He expressed His indignation when the disciples brushed the little children way from Him (Mark 10:14).
💚 Jesus was distressed with the Pharisees (Mark 3:5).
💚 Jesus was moved with compassion (Mark 6:34).
💚 Jesus was full of joy through the Holy Spirit (Luke 10:21).
💚 Jesus was sorrowful and troubled (Matthew 26:37-38).
💚 Jesus lingers even now, because the Lord is patient (2 Peter 3:9).
In other words, there aren’t good emotions OR bad emotions- just healthy and unhealthy expressions of each.
Our emotions are a thermometer to read the world around us. They aren’t thermostats.
And, since that’s the case, we have control over how we express them…
Here’s the emotional wholeness checklist…
… and how to allow ANY emotion serve you….
👉 Recognize your emotion.
👉 Read what it’s communicating to you.
👉 Respond in a healthy way
Free gift = download our Stress Shield book here =
In the Emotional Wholeness Checklist book, we outline 3 simple steps (yes, they're EASIER said than done, for sure) that will empower you to allow your emotions to serve you RATHER THAN you being held hostage by them, yanked around by them...
And, we content that 0ur emotions are gifts, things God gave us in order to help us understand what's happening around us and in us.
In the same way that physical sensations such as pleasure and pain help us encounter the world, so also do emotional sensations (such as fear and joy).
📺 Learn more about the video course here =
📚 Grab the book in the OilyApp Shop =
As well, we’ve written TWO MORE books about emotions—
👉 Healthy Hustle (about how our identity, our need to perform, and our desire to achieve can get wrapped in our emotions) =
👉 Claim Your Freedom (about PTSD + emotional trauma, and leaving the past for wholeness in this area) =